How her father made me a better wife

Dads don’t babysit. (it’s called “parenting”)

A british dad became viral wearing his shirt from the National At-Home Dad Network. Even if stay at-home dads are a minority, I am glad to see there is also support for them.

In moms communities we tend to forget speaking about them. Or if we do, it’s to complain…the typical “Sex in the City” gossip.

Think about your partner’s qualities, mark what you gain from him, and think more and more about it.

I would like to take the opportunity to say how important my husband is to me and help you realize  how important yours is to you.

I was watching them play and laugh the other day…they are beautiful. One of those divine moments. Time is suspended, butterfly in the stomach, wet eyes. I am impressed with the way my husband is as a father. I always saw him confident and cheerful around children. I knew he would be good at it but the reality is even better.

He is a guy, he is not perfect. Neither are we. They all are the same: procrastinator, grown up child, clumsy, well guys…

We are constantly complaining about our lover. This is also what makes us who we are. We want to keep fighting against their imperfections and are obviously always right…

More seriously, we are lucky they don’t do the same. Home would be a battlefield otherwise.

I decided to proceed differently. To change the way I deal with my tolerance level. Especially when you have kids, being tolerant become fundamental. Many times, he is busy working and I have to deal with an active munchkin alone. Nothing crazy, just a typical mother’s life… but enough to make me nervously tight.

Until one day, I thought twice and realized how easily mad I could get when in stress.

C’mon, I only have one child and am lucky to have my husband by my side. I don’t know how single mothers do it. All my respect to you ladies! I questioned myself and accepted I would rather put things into perspective than irritate myself and end up dealing with a crisis.

It’s also a matter of fairness, he does not deserve it. He is the best father our daughter could have. He is so involved, playful, careful, patient, tolerant.

“Playful, patient and tolerant” are the things I am learning from him. A team work can’t function if accomplished in one direction only. I definitely need to work on myself.

  • I am playful but nothing compared to him. Everything he does with her turns into a big beautiful loud laugh. He just has it, either she is cranky or moody. They crack me up, I wish I had the same sense of silliness.
  • Since Elizabeth was born (and before) he always has impressed me with his patience. Give him a crying or agitated baby, a stressful situation, chinese puzzle or have him teach wisely…he has it too. When he decides to do something, he is 200% involved and devoted.
  • Tolerance might be my biggest weakness in life. For my defense, it’s running in my family. We have standards and are kind of glued to, with an excessive love for debate. When on the other hand, my husband is the best at compromising. Accommodate everything and everyone.

All of those qualities are essential to highlight rather than focusing on late daily routine tasks or lack of house chores work. Especially since we are parents.

These are what I learn on a daily basis from my love. But everyone is different.

Your homework is to think about your partner’s qualities, mark what you gain from him, and think more and more about it.

With love,

E

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