How are you ? Have you seen the news ? How is life with your kid(s) ? When are you planning on having another baby?
It mostly happens like that, from unexpected people. Am I the only one being annoyed by that ? Read More »
Tag: parenting
Words from a mother in fear
It was Monday night. Almost bathtime. Still trying to process the Orlando attack, I listened to live French news. A father, police officer was stabbed to death on his way home. The attacker entered the home to take the mother and their 3 years old son hostages. Four hours later, only he survived, orphan. One more in the name of radical Islamism.
49 – Orlando, FL. USA
32 – Brussels, Belgium.
37 – Ankara, Turkey
129 – Paris, France.
14 – San Bernardino, CA. USA.
….
I am sorry for all the ones I forget. My mind does not process anymore.
I am starting my motherhood life dealing with atrocity I can’t understand and handle. The shock started when I was 4 months pregnant with the Charlie Hebdo attack. Our daughter was 3 months old at the time of the Paris attacks. And it continues. One after the other, here and there, as she grows and as I (try to) gain confidence in my daily mother’s job. Read More »
Paris, France, French | behind the cliches
What is Paris? Who are parisians? I am sure you have your own opinion.
Paris? I hear “romantic”, “historic”, “lovely”, “city of love”, “dreamy”.
Parisians/ French? I hear “pretentious”, “socialist”, “mean”, “well dressed”, “slim”, “stinky”.
Extra note: “The food, OMG the food!”
Alright. I am very often told these assumptions, I find myself too many times unable to answer. Being expatriate for more than 5 years now, I have a fair perspective of the French culture in and out of France.
Let’s start with the basic. France is not Paris, like the US is not New York City. And French are not Parisians like Americans are not New Yorkers. I have lived in many different parts of France (from the capital to the smallest village, from East to West). I also have lived in different cities (big and small) and States in the United States (from East to West).
“Pretentious”
French are not pretentious, not willingly at least. I agree we can give this image. The truth is we have in mind to always be at the top of ourself. We also have a passion for debate. When a French has an opinion, good luck with it, let the trial begging. Both of these elements give an attitude that can look like pretension. We also love our culture, are proud of it and think this is the best. Just like you love your Nation, are proud of it and think this is the best. Read More »
Those 5 steps will help you handle any crisis
Isn’t this picture already making you feel better?
Now, breeze, relax, and read this.
We all go through episodes in life that require skills and experience to be properly handled. It can be a matter of hours, days or months depending on what we are dealing with. But it always challenges our nerves. Here is how I manage my episodes:
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Self-control
The most important, yet difficult, is to not do or say something you can regret. This is the first but hardest part of the process. It requires a good sense of self-control that can be gained overtime. If you do not possess it, you would need to work on it.
I am certainly not gifted with such a wisdom. I like to think of what the consequences would be if I followed my impulsions.
Ignorance is bliss. Anything you say and do can and will be used against you. Life does overall a good job in getting what you ask for. Karma will do the rest for you.Read More »
How her father made me a better wife
Dads don’t babysit. (it’s called “parenting”)
A british dad became viral wearing his shirt from the National At-Home Dad Network. Even if stay at-home dads are a minority, I am glad to see there is also support for them.
In moms communities we tend to forget speaking about them. Or if we do, it’s to complain…the typical “Sex in the City” gossip.
Think about your partner’s qualities, mark what you gain from him, and think more and more about it.
I would like to take the opportunity to say how important my husband is to me and help you realize how important yours is to you. Read More »
When mother means superhero
And here we are ladies, Mothers.
Mothers of one. Mothers of two..three…four, boys, girls…
Before we got pregnant, we had no idea what mother meant, what it takes of course, and what they are. Mothers are not like any other human being.
From the day we give birth and the following months, we have this need to share and express what we feel and what we go through. Like if we were the very first woman on this planet to experience motherhood. Reason why there are so many moms communities.
Why?
A “new us” emerged when giving birth to our babies.
This is what makes us so special, so unique.
This “new us” is the same version of ourself but stronger and reckless. Strength makes us do things we never thought capable of doing.
Becoming a Mother is a regeneration
How we prepare our daughter to be strong
The day of our wedding, my dad gave a very powerful speech. The kind that, as a bride, daughter, wife and mom, I will never forget. Each and every one of his words went under my skin, spreading chills.
Part of it was about the woman I had become, from his point of view. “Yesterday the rebel kid, you have today developed into a determined woman, who carefully completes everything she undertakes. You impress me when I see the perfectionism you implement to meet your ambitions”
[goosebumps…tears…goosebumps].
I had the happiest childhood surrounded by my parents and two siblings. My father is a businessman and my mother quit her career to take care of us. Only when you become a mother yourself you understand what it takes and what it means. I feel kind of ashamed not to have realized before. Because she has done and does so much for us.
My sister, brother and myself have been raised with authority. Of course with tons of love and a touch of craziness. Add to that an intense and long ballet training amongst the best ballet schools in Paris. I can pretty much admit I am comfortable with strictness.
In a society where authority over children is far from being popular, weakness/fragility/easiness have become a trend.
Sleep deprived? How to teach baby to sleep through the night
When will my baby sleep through the night? How many times have you asked yourself this question?
At 8 weeks old our daughter was sleeping from 11pm – 9 am straight and at 4 months old 8pm to 8pm. Yes she is an amazing sleeper but not only.
The most common comment I received after “you are so lucky” is probably “you have such an easy baby”.
TRUE and FALSE. She was such an easy going newborn in so many ways. Although, sleeping through the night is also a matter of process and method. It does not come by magic.
WHERE DOES THE NEWBORN SLEEP?Read More »
Why are we happy to raise our daughter in the US?
Being a French mom of on American baby is compelling. There are many aspects of why her dad and I are proud to be raising a dual citizen, bilingual, multicultural baby. You might think I am lucky to have the French parenting given to myself. Actually, I feel even luckier having French and American parenting offered to me.
French mothers have the keys to have calm and/or maybe obedient children. It gives them the opportunity to be back on track, socially, fashionably, professionally etc.
This is what I found very interesting with American parenting. It includes the mother wellness differently than in France. US mamas know how to step back and relax. In France, their peace of mind comes from the baby’s behavior.
You give yourself no pressure whatsoever. Go grocery shopping in your PJ’s? Not a problem. Stay at home doing nothing? Not a problem. No makeup or hairdo? Not a problem. It is all about enjoying every second with your baby.
American/French parenting, from a French expat perspective
French parenting. What a fancy way to relate to kids manners. Pamela Druckerman certainly brought it up with her famous book: Bringing Up Bébé, published in 2012.
But what does a French expatriate think of it?
First and foremost, I arrived in the US on December 2010. I loved it, I still love it, I would not leave the country for anything. Even if the culture is not as close as we can think it is. One of the biggest contrast, along with food would probably be kids behavior. I always noticed a difference but I started getting more curious about it when I was pregnant. The only way for me to understand the disparity was to read Bringing Up Bébé. I was not disappointed. Druckerman did a great job pointing out what was the most normal things for French, the most unrealistic for Americans.
French parents teach young ones proper rules (understand “guidelines” if rules is too strong), as early as possible so it becomes a basic as they grow. Each and everyone of the guidelines have an impact on the following. It is like a snowball effect. Let’s take food for example. If you feed your kid with Mac & Cheese, Cheerios, meatballs and Gold Fish (it is an extreme case of course), you cannot expect him/her to eat vegetables at 5,6 or 7 years old because you decided to. It is best to start early and continue, so fruits and veggies are as normal as Mac & Cheese or fries.
My observation is that American babies and toddlers tend to take control more than their French cousins . Why is that? Read More »
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