No cuddles from your baby | How to accept

She is everything we asked for. We wanted a beautiful independent silly baby. We got her: the most beautiful independent silly girl. Playful, easygoing, a delight when it comes to eat, never had to get up at night, smiling, social…

You get it…mama bear’s speaking of her baby girl!

 

During my pregnancy I was over informed about baby bonding, skin to skin contact and tons of other techniques that help connecting with baby, which is good.

Except that I was not prepared to face such an independent baby. All the bondings techniques may have alleviated our connection (that is beautiful and unique) but it has nothing to do with the cuddles like I thought it would. Read More »

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How her father made me a better wife

Dads don’t babysit. (it’s called “parenting”)

A british dad became viral wearing his shirt from the National At-Home Dad Network. Even if stay at-home dads are a minority, I am glad to see there is also support for them.

In moms communities we tend to forget speaking about them. Or if we do, it’s to complain…the typical “Sex in the City” gossip.

Think about your partner’s qualities, mark what you gain from him, and think more and more about it.

I would like to take the opportunity to say how important my husband is to me and help you realize  how important yours is to you. Read More »

When mother means superhero

And here we are ladies, Mothers.

Mothers of one. Mothers of two..three…four, boys, girls…

Before we got pregnant, we had no idea what mother meant, what it takes of course, and what they are. Mothers are not like any other human being.

From the day we give birth and the following months, we have this need to share and express what we feel and what we go through. Like if we were the very first woman on this planet to experience motherhood. Reason why there are so many moms communities.

Why?

A “new us” emerged when giving birth to our babies.

This is what makes us so special, so unique.

This “new us” is the same version of ourself but stronger and reckless. Strength makes us do things we never thought capable of doing.

Becoming a Mother is a regeneration

Read More »

Dad’s struggle is real. Easy ways to help him be a father.

Carrying and having a baby is quite an adventure. The challenge is physical, emotional and nervous. We know it.

But let’s pause and go back where you were before baby arrived. You had the idyll life as a couple, and it may be your motivation to go a step forward. Or it may not but, you had it going for you anyway.

Baby’s arrival disrupts the couple balance.

No matter how arduous this is, mothers have prepared (consciously and unconsciously) for it, pretty much all their life.  Nobody can deny women are (at least physically) intended to give birth. We’ve prepared for years and bonded 9 months to be ready to meet baby.

Dads do not possess the ability to build-up the same mental and emotional strength. This must be brutal for them. They are way behind us and need to catch-up very fast, what we’ve built for all this time.

Read More »

The unpractical survival guide to the first days following birth

Do you feel the contractions? Here they are. Finally !

You try to follow your birth plan, if you have one. I, personally trained and prepared myself with and for hypnobirthing.

Long story short, I had quite a long labor with different phases: 30 hours and 1 hour pushing.

Yet, I was mentally and physically prepared.

Oddly, the one hour pushing felt like an easy game. Baby and I worked together, we were connected.

I gave birth.

And here she was, in my arms, on my chest. Like to pursue the connection we had built, to tell me “we did it mom”, she stared at me, with her eyes wide open. Balancing form my left to right eye. We were physically discovering each others. She was extending the bonding we created for 9 months. It was strong.

pied naissance Elizabeth (1)After minutes of intense fusion, they took her to the scale and did everything she was scheduled for, like every newborn.

I found this to be a tricky moment. Alone. Of course, daddy is with the baby. You still have work to end with the OB and the medical team. Read More »